Monday, March 19, 2012

Grandparents and Adoption

If I had to name one person who was impacted as heavily as I was by placing my daughter, Chloe, for adoption, it would have to be my mother.  Now, I don't mean to understate how significantly my father or my siblings or others were impacted.  This decision of mine had a stone thrown into a still lake effect.  The little waves reached far and wide.

But my mother felt it as I did.  I watched her walk through the pregnancy, labor, delivery, and placement for adoption, as she watched me walk through the same.  We shared tears on many occasions.  I knew she was sad for me to lose out on the mothering experience with Chloe.  She was also sad with me because she was losing out on the grandmothering experience with Chloe.  And from what I hear, grandparenting is WAY better than parenting.

When I finally chose an adoptive family, some of my mother's pain was eased.  Chloe would be local.  Accessible.  With a family that went to our church.  With a family that was extremely open to continuing relationships with my family.  I was so glad for my mom.  She would still get to have a relationship with her granddaughter.  In fact, she gained a grandson as well, since Chloe's forever family had a son, too.

My mom has babysat on numerous occasions for Chloe and her brother, Shiloh.  They call her Meemaw, just like my nieces do, although the significance of that won't sink in until they're older, probably.  (side note, I have no idea how to spell "Meemaw"....memaw? mimaw? meeeeemaw??)

I love that Chloe has so many grandparents to love her.  I hope she grows up loving that too.

Momma Acuff with Chloe,  ~ 3 weeks old

Pa Acuff with Chloe, ~ 18 months old

**I'm linking up with Open Adoption Roundtable.


sparklejenna said...

That's so awesome that your family was still able to have that special relationship with Chloe! Such a blessing for everyone! Thanks for sharing your story

julie sims said...

My husband and I are in the process of adopting and I hope we end up having an open relationship with everyone involved especially the mother and grandmother as you have just described in your post. It is what we are praying for!