Thursday, October 1, 2015


I have been donating to my gym for about 4-5 months now. Donating, in this context, means giving money monthly to a gym establishment of which I never, ever make use of.

Today I decided to change that.  Both kids went to preschool (yay for healthy enough kids to go to school) and I had about two+ hours to call my own.  I wore my bathing suit under my clothes to preschool drop-off.  I was prepared to go straight from there to the gym.

While driving away from the preschool I realized I don't have any goggles for to swim wiff.  Quick pit-stop at Target required.  No problem as there is one between the preschool and the gym.  While walking into Target I realize I have no towel.  Great.  Procured swim goggles and towel at Target.  Off to the gym I go.

When the lady took my keys with my gym bar-code-card attached and scanned it, she did a double take at the computer screen.  I'm not sure exactly what that screen said, but it was probably something along the lines of "OMG...CONGRATULATE THIS GYM MEMBER FOR FINALLY COMING BACK!"

Let's back up...a little swimming history first.  I know how to swim. (hooray!) I was on the swim team in high school.  I wasn't exactly the biggest asset to the team, but they didn't really make cuts, so even I MADE THE TEAM! Woohoo!  Since high school, I haven't chosen swimming as my go-to exercise mode.  I usually default to running.  The older I get, the more painful it is to my back and other parts of me to re-start running.  Thus my brilliant idea to try swimming.  No impact, aerobic, good times.  What could go wrong?!

I'll tell what can go wrong:  THERE IS NO AIR IN THE WATER.


I got in, pushed off the wall and began freestyling my way down the lane.  After two pulls my lungs were screaming "WHY DID WE THINK THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?!"  I ended up breathing after every other stroke.  Gasping is more like it.

I wasn't moving very fast, but I sure was breathing like I was swimming like this:

I had to laugh at myself.  The logic of switching to swimming from running as a get-in-shape exercise seemed so solid.  Until I realized I can only breathe about half the time while swimming, unlike ALL the time during running.  Minor oversight...

I switched to breaststroke and backstroke a whole lot during this first round of swammin'.  More access to oxygen in those strokes.

Of the 45 minute swam-tastic event, I walked, yes WALKED, about 10-15 minutes.  Pretty sure the other pool/gym goers were probably like " she walking in the pool?? Doesn't she know there are treadmills for that?  And she doesn't need a bathing suit?  Bless her heart." It is the south after all.

There were three swimming lanes total. An older lady in the lane beside me totally kicked my butt the whole time.  The older gentleman in the lane beside her also kicked my butt.

Maybe that's my problem?  I'm just too YOUNG to swim....