One Week Ago

Mark made his dramatic entry into the world one week ago today.

And what a day it was!

Over the next few days, I'll be piecing together Mark's birth story.  In the mean time, I'll tell you about the here and now.

We are:

Tired.  *shocker* Mark is doing well eating every 1-3 hours during the day and 3-4 hours at night.  Scott has been taking the first portion of the night shift.  After we get the older two in bed between 7-730pm, I feed Mark and then head to bed myself.  I cat nap until the next feeding time.  Scott stays up with him and keeps him happy until it's time to wake me up around 11pm or 12am (depending on what time Mark ate last).  Then Scott goes to bed and I take over.  Thankfully, James and Reese are sleeping decently these days and not requiring anything in the overnight hours.

Grateful:  There's not a lot of glamour involved at this stage of the game.  My body feels like it's been through the ringer for sure.  HOWEVER, I have a thousand things for which to be grateful.  I didn't have to have a c-section.  Breastfeeding is going okay.  (doing a combo of breast and bottle currently) My milk supply is...ABUNDANT.  Mark seems to be pretty laid back most of the time.  James and Reese LOVE him.  Scott is off work right now and so incredibly helpful.  Our church family is feeding us regularly.  Those are just a few things, but there are many more.

Adjusting:  As anyone might have guessed, I think this transition has been hardest on Reese.  She love love loves Mark, but is easily frustrated by how little she can do with and for him.  She wants to touch him all the time, hug him, kiss him, etc.  And I want her to leave the sleeping baby ALONE.  I know she's missing my involvement in her day, too.  Scott has been handling more of her day to day needs than I have.  She prefers me.  (James prefers Scott, so it's all fair...)  Overall I think she's doing well, but when her frustration level is on the rise, her behavior can send Scott and I over the edge pretty quick-like.  Pray for patience...for all of us. James doesn't seem to bothered by the whole situation.  He checks on the baby frequently, but doesn't share Reese's exasperation about how much he sleeps or how frequently he eats.

What's different this time:  When James was born, the first week was a complete and total BLUR.  I don't think I slept much at all.  I felt overwhelmed.  When Reese was born, I was a little more prepared for how it would be, but it was still overwhelming.  This go-round I would say the first week has been about as good as it could possibly be.  My recovery is going decently.  Mark seems to be doing pretty well.  My expectations have been pretty spot on with our reality.  I reserve the right to change my mind about this in another week or two when Scott is back at work and the kids are back in school, but so far the transition to "party of five" has gone well.

• a related post from 3 weeks after James was born
• another one from after Reese was born

Baby Gear Must-Haves

New moms:  As you've probably already discovered, the more moms you ask about baby stuff you absolutely must have, the more recommendations you'll get.  Well, here's my two cents on the matter.

Bare essentials list, in random order, followed by pictures of what I chose:  

1) Place to sleep. Could be a bassinet.  Could be a crib.  At times you'll want that sleeping containment area as close to you as possible.  At other times you'll want to move it to another country.

*baby not included

2) Diapers.  Cloth, not cloth.  Whatever suits your fancy.  Take the advice of those that have gone before you, you're going to want to cover up that cute little butt.

3) Food.  Formula, breast feeding, again, whatever suits your fancy.  Kid's gotta eat.

my freezer stash

Although I chose breastfeeding, I felt a picture of my boobs would be inappropriate.  Not ready to head in that direction with this blog...

4) Car seat.  Lots and lots of choices here.  Ask your friends what they like/dislike about the car seat they chose.  The hospital staff won't let you go home from the hospital with your new little babe without this key item.

5) Clothes.  Options are endless here.  I'd recommend CUTE.

The non-bare essentials list:

A)  Some sort of baby bathtub, so as not to drown the child while trying to get them clean.

B)  Swaddle blankets.  I highly recommend swaddling your kiddo to keep them happier.  These light weight blankets (Aden & Anais) were awesome:

C)  Regardless of your feeding choice, you will need bottles at some point.  Lots of them.  If you are breast feeding and pumping, extra pump parts would be helpful, too.

D)  Pacifiers.  Wow.  These absolutely improved our quality of life for the first several weeks.

E)  Comfortable chair.  I've spent a LOT of time in this chair and in the recliner in the living room.  You need a comfortable spot to set up "shop" for all the millions of hours spent feeding your baby.

F)  Bumbo.  I haven't really gotten a ton of use out of this yet.  But some moms swear by them.

*duck not included

G)  Bouncy seat or swing.  Could NOT have survived our first few weeks without our bouncy seat.  James was a huge fan of sleeping in it.  And we were huge fans of James sleeping.  Sooo....   We didn't use our swing much at all, but some babies love the swing.

H)  Play mat.  Our kid loves his.  

I)  Boppy.  I've found this very, very helpful with breastfeeding.  

J)  Not at all helpful:  a sunbathing cat.  As I was walking around the apartment photographing all the various baby gear items, I saw this on the back porch.  Not only is Nestle NOT helpful with the baby, she actually helps create more mess for me to clean up.  If you don't have pets already, now is not the time to get one. :)

K)  Last but definitely not least, the most helpful thing to have when you have a new baby:  A PARTNER. 

Even if said partner despises having his picture taken and posted on the interwebs.

6 weeks

Today James is 6 weeks old.  I'm sorry there's no 6 week picture, but that requires entirely too much effort.

I thought by now...

...we'd be sleeping, on occasion, longer than 0-2 hours at a time.
(Feedings generally take about an hour.  Not because he eats very long at all, but the eating/trying to convince him to eat/burping/diaper changing/calming him down/getting him to sleep takes about an hour. Last night he ate at 8:30pm, 11:30pm, 2:30am, 4:30am, 6:30am, 8am, 9am, 10am...) 

...that I'd feel warm, fuzzy, and gushy inside about motherhood.
(Today I had a total meltdown.  I felt weepy, tired, angry and frustrated.)

...that I'd feel more competent as a mom.
(Today I felt like an incompetent failure as a mom and wife.  I can't make my baby happy, or keep him happy for very long. MOM-FAILURE!  My husband has to swoop in and save the day all.the.time.  WIFE-FAILURE!)

...nursing would be a breeze.
(He eats for 3-5 minutes at a time most of the time.  I cannot seem to convince him to eat longer.  He latches fine and is gaining weight, but this is certainly contributing to his short sleeping intervals.  Well, that and he spits up as a hobby.  Fun times.)


That's all.  Sorry for the debbie-downer post.  Just keepin' it real, folks.